Wednesday, 13 June 2007

Bad Date...Part 1

One day, when I was younger, I got a call from a female "friend" of mine in Cape Town whom I had not seen or heard from for over 3 years! She said said she'd be in JHB for a week the following week and wanted to meet up for dinner.

Being young, reckless, single and good-looking, I thought to myself, "hey, why not...you never know!"

I was to meet her at a designated area in a shopping mall for the date.

On the night, I was all revved up and ready to go. As I approached the designated meeting area, I noticed my friend and waved. She looked at me strangely.

As I approached closer, I said "hi! How are you". Again, she gave me this confused look. I was worried.

Anyway, I proceeded to try and converse with this confused creature. Eventually, she clicked and recognised me from 3 years ago!!

She had apparently called the wrong "Warren" and thought she was going on a date with the "other" Warren!


Man, I think I might have varied between 12 shades of red!


Needless to say, I left in a hurry!

Friday, 1 June 2007

LOVE people, USE things....

...Never get the two mixed up!

I went to a work colleague's retirement this past Tuesday - Mike Cormick from Vodacom. Very nice gentleman whom I have worked with for the past 6 years on various Vodacom projects.

Anyway, in Mike's retirement speach, he said there are 3 things that he has learnt in his life time that will gear him for an enjoyable retirement:

1) Keep healthy throughout your life by eating healthy and exercising regularly so that you can do all the things you want to do when you retire;

2) Save enough for retirement - Well, that just speaks for itself;

3) Lastly, he mentioned that quote above in the title. "Love people and use things...don't get the two mixed up"!

I thought this last statement was so profound as it left me pondering the thought that even I do that sometimes! I have become so materialistic and have fallen into the trap of LOVING things and USING people for my own selfish gain.

Well, needless to say, I am going to make a conscience effort to start making that statement a part of my life and try and rectify some of the wrong I have done.

Thanks for opening my eyes, Mike! All of the best!

Sunday, 20 May 2007

19 May 2007 Individual Shiai


The 19th of May saw the first Individual Kendo Shiai of the SAKF for 2007 at the Japanese School. Unfortunately the turnout was not too good as only 11 competitors pitched up for the event- 6 for the Kyu grade shiai and 5 for the Dan grade shiai.

Nevertheless, the excitement amongst the competitors was evident from the first few fights in the Kyu grade shiai!

The Kyu grade competitors comprised of Desley, Sebastian and Ebrahem from the Fodushin Dojo, Smith(?) from KenYuKai and Magen and Andrew from the San Kawa Dojo.

The Kyu fights were spirited and eventually Andrew and Magen had a face-off in the 1st semi final. Andrew won with 2 mens to proceed to the finals. The second semi final was between Smith and Ebrahem with Ebrahem proceeding to the finals.

The Kyu final between Andrew and Ebrahem took place before the Dan grade Final. Andrew won the Kyu grade division with a men strike.

In the Dan competition, there were 2 pools. The first pool comprised of Mitchell, Craig and myself. The 2nd pool comprised of Ivor and Francis.

In the first pool, Mitch and I fought with Mitch taking an early do. I countered with a debane kote, but Mitch eventually won with a do cut.

The 2nd match between Mitch and Craig ended with Mitch losing by a kote.

The 3rd match was between Craig and myself. I took my first point for the day with a single- handed tsuki thrust! I thought it was pretty good as I hit the target spot on, with the foot-stomp and kiai (That is what the picture is of, by the way)! Anyway, Craig came back with a do strike. I eventually won with a men strike.

Since there was a draw in the 1st pool as each competitor won one and lost one, we had to have a rematch round-robin, but only with one-point match:

1st round again was Mitch and myself. I took his men and won that fight.

2nd round was Craig and myself. I lost as Craig took my kote.

3rd fight was Craig and Mitch, with Mitch losing to Craig with a men strike.

So, as it stood, Craig and myself would proceed to the semi-finals.

The second pool of Ivor and Francis only had the one fight with Francis being victorious with 2 men strikes. They both proceeded to the semi finals.

The first semi-final was between Francis and myself. Francis took the match with a men and kote strike to proceed into the finals.

The 2nd semi-final was between Craig and Ivor. Craig won with 2 do strikes.

The final between Francis and Craig was long as it went past the 3 minute mark and into extra time. Craig eventually took men to win the shiai.

All in all, considering the number of competitors, the shiai wend well and I think we all learnt a thing or two for next time.

Wednesday, 9 May 2007

Heaven on Earth...One [9 May 2007]

This is a picture taken in 2004 when I went on the Otto Trail which runs through the Tsitsikamma National Park which stretches for 80 km along the scenic southern Cape coast and 5,5 km out to sea.

It's beautiful and is probably one of the places I would call "Heaven on Earth".

For more info on the Otto Trail, visit: http://www.antbear.co.za/information/otter-trail.htm

Note that I was the last one at the end of a hiking group of 10 people! It was my first 5 day hike (42km), EVER! Impressive, eh?

It was also during a time that Laura and I had just started dating! Man, did I see a different side of her! RUFF AND TOUGH!! :p

Tuesday, 8 May 2007

88 Ways to Know If You're Chinese [8 May 2007]

I got this from a friend of mine! I have modified a few cause they were more for the American Chinese! However, it's amazing how many of these apply to me!

I reckon if you have 10 or more, you have some Chinese in you! Take a read!

01. You look like you are 18 and still get asked for ID at clubs.

02. You like to eat chicken feet that's pickled, steamed or in soups.

03. You suck on fish heads and fish fins.

04. You have a Chinese knick-knack hanging on your rear view mirror.

05. You sing karaoke.

06. Your house is covered with tiles.

07. Your kitchen is covered by a sticky film of grease.

08. Your stove is covered with aluminium foil.

09. You leave the plastic covers on your remote control.

10. You've never kissed your mom or dad.

11. You've never hugged your mom or dad.

12. Your unassisted vision is worse than 20/500.

13. You wear contacts, to avoid wearing your "coke bottle glasses".

14. You've worn glasses since you were in primary school.

15. Your hair sticks up when you wake up.

16. You'll haggle over something that is not negotiable.

17. You love freebies.

18. You drive around for hours looking for the best parking space.

19. You take showers at night.

20. You avoid the non-free snacks in hotel rooms.

21. You don't mind squeezing 20 people into one motel room.

22. Most girls have more body hair than you, if you are male.

23. You tap the table when someone pours tea for you.

24. You say "Aiya!" and "Wah!" frequently.

25. You don't want to wear your seatbelt because it is uncomfortable.

26. You love casinos, slot machines, and blackjack.

27. You unwrap Christmas gifts very carefully, so you can reuse the paper.

28. You only buy Christmas cards after Christmas, when they are 50% off.

29. You have a vinyl table cloth on your kitchen table.

30. You spit bones and other food scraps on the table. That's why you need the vinyl tablecloth.

31. You have stuff in the freezer since the beginning of time.

32. You have more than one freezer / fridge in your home. Even more if you have a shop.

33. You use the dishwasher as a dish rack.

34. You have never used your dishwasher.

35. You keep a Thermos of hot water available at all times.

36. You eat all meals in the kitchen.

37. You save plastic bags, tin foil, containers and newspaper.

38. You have a piano in your living room.

39. You pick your teeth at the dinner table (but you cover your mouth).

40. You twirl your pen around your fingers.

41. You hate to waste food.

42. You have Tupperware in your fridge with three bites of rice or one leftover chicken wing.

43. You don't own any real Tupperware - only a cupboard full of used but carefully rinsed margarine tubs, takeout containers, and jam jars.

44. You also use the jam jars as drinking glasses.

45. You have a collection of miniature shampoo bottles that you take every time you stay in a hotel.

46. You carry a stash of your own food whenever you travel (travel means any car ride longer than 15 minutes). These snacks are always dried and include dried plums, mango, ginger, and squid.

47. You wash your rice at least 2-3 times before cooking it.

48. Your dad thinks he can fix everything himself.

49. The dash board of your Honda is covered by hundreds of small toys.

50. You don't use measuring cups.

51. You beat eggs with chopsticks.

52. You have a teacup with a cover on it.

53. You go to the cemetary at least once a week.

54. Your family gathering normally entail hiring out the entire restaurant.

55. If you are male, you clap at something funny and if you are female, you giggle whilst placing a hand over your mouth.

56. You like Chinese films in their original undubbed versions.

57. You love Chinese Martial Arts films.

58. You've learnt some form of martial arts.

59. Shaolin actually mean something to you.

60. You like congee with thousand year old eggs.

61. You prefer your shrimp with the heads and legs still attached.

62. You never call your parents just to say hi.

63. If you don't live at home, when your parents call, they ask if you've eaten, even if it's midnight.

64. When you're sick, your parents tell you not to eat fried foods or baked goods due to yeet hay.

65. You know what yeet hay is.

66. You e-mail your Chinese friends at work, even though you are a few desks away.

67. You use a face cloth.

68. You starve yourself before going to all you can eat places.

69. You know someone who can get you a good deal on jewelry or electronics.

70. You save your old Coke bottle glasses even though you're never going to use them again.

71. You own your own meat cleaver and sharpen it.

72. Your toothpaste tubes are all squeezed paper-thin.

73. You know what moon cakes are.

74. When there is a sale on toilet paper, you buy 100 rolls and store them in your closet or in the bedroom of an adult child who has moved out.

75. Your parents know how to launch nasal projectiles.

76. You iron your own shirts.

77. You play a musical instrument.

78. Even if you're totally full, if someone says they're going to throw away the leftovers on the table, you'll finish them.

79. You've eaten a red bean popsicle.

80. You bring oranges (or other produce) with you as a gift when you visit people's homes.

81. You fight over who pays the dinner bill.

82. You majored in something practical like engineering, medicine or law.

83. You live with your parents and you are 30 years old (and they prefer it that way). Or if you're married and 30 years old, you live in the apartment next door to your parents, or at least in the same neighbourhood.

84. You don't tip more than 10% at a restaurant, and if you do, you tip Chinese delivery guys/waiters more.

85. You have acquired a taste for bitter melon.

86. You eat every last grain of rice in your bowl, but don't eat the last piece of food on the table.

87. You are afraid of the number 4.

88. You know why there are 88 reasons.

Monday, 7 May 2007

Spiderman VS Beavis and Butthead [7 May 2007]


I went to watch the Spiderman 3 movie this weekend... twice in fact! Yup, I am a nerd and I know it! Once on Friday with my best mate Gary and Michelle, then again on Sunday with my family.

The movie was good, but didn't have as much depth as the first two. The 3 villains featured in this movie were the Sandman, Venom and the New Green Goblin (or as Spidey put it.."baby goblin")! There was a really nice surprise twist at the end that was great, but other than that, it was a pretty standard sci-fi movie with plenty of CGI!

Anyway, sitting in the movie the second time round at the Monte Casino cinema was a bit challenging, considering I sat next to a pair of Afrikaans guys who could just not shut up during the movie! I've even gone as far as to call them, "Beavis and Butthead" as their constant remarks and mannerism reminded me of those 90's cartoon characters from the USA that probably had us all mimic their hideous giggle (....he..he..he..snort..snort..snort) .

The one guy had his sandles off most of the time and was waving his bare feet about very closely to my knee at times. Not only that, his constant remarks (in Afrikaans) would push that movie's age restriction up to a SVNL 21 category! It was most annoying! (p.s. SVNL stands for "Sex, Violence, Nudity, Language" - The things one picks up when we're kids)!

Sometimes, after a stupid comment, I would deliberately turn my head 90 degrees at him and give him a greasy eye-balled look in the dark. It must've work cause he would then shut up for a few minutes. Not enough for the whole movie unfortunately. By my 12th head-turn, I was starting to feel the effects similar to whip-lash in my neck, so I resorted to the occasional disapproving head-shake and rolling eyes. I hope he noticed this.

Anyway, after enduring 2 hrs and 30 minutes of B&B's comments, the movie eventually finished.

I can't say much other than I'm grateful I saw the movie once before on the Friday because I probably spend more time being annoyed with Beavis and Butthead and listening to their comments rather than pay attention to the movie the second time round.

Sunday, 6 May 2007

My Keiko opponent....myself...[6 May 2007]

The goal of kendo is "the development of self thought the application of the sword".

I had a rather nasty experience in my Kendo practise session on Thursday at the KenYuKai dojo that pushed me along this path, or so I think.

It was with one of that dojo's club members that I had an argument with. Actually, it was more of a one sided argument as he was the one hurling most of the abuse.

During a keiko match with him, he went for my men (head) target and followed  though past me. As he turned around to face me, I was ready to repay the strike with a men strike of my own. As I did it, I was told by him that I was wrong and should I ever do that to him again, I would be "£$%- up! Naturally, I was shocked by his comments as the strike is normal in keiko practise, and is used to take advantage of those who don't not block or get out of the way after a strike attempt!  I tried to explain the strike was a legitimate attempt, but saw my words were falling on deaf ears. We continued with the keiko match. However, I could feel his anger oozing from his armour (as well as see some whispered profanities from his mouth) which made it all that much easier to avoid his strike attempts and allow me to strike his targets...men..kote..men..men..kote...kote...men. Wasn't too much of a challenge as by now, his anger had reached such a height, I think l could swing a mallet over his head, crack his skull open, and he still would not feel anything (amazing what anger can make you do)! Anyway, I decided to stop the match as it would be pointless trying to continue.

Ray sensei, who was sitting on the sidelines but unfortunately did not see the incident,came over and asked why we had stopped. I explained what happened and he agreed with me that my strike was legit.He tried to explain this to my opponent, but again, nothing was getting through.

Anyway,to cut the story short, at the end of practise , Ray sensei asked Buster Sensei for his opinion on the matter,and again, Buster Sensei acknowledged my strike was legit. He called my opponent and I over to explain the situation. My opponent did the talking, saying things like I have no respect, didn't know keiko etiquette, etc, etc. I felt he was getting really personal at times! Buster Sensei listened and eventfully said that I was right as in keiko, it should be full-blooded attacks all the time if there is no major difference in rank. This, he continued, is how it is done here, in Japan, and everywhere else in the world where Kendo is practised.If you don't defend yourself as you turn to face your opponent, you deserve to be killed!

(This next bit is the best..) My opponent then shouted back saying that this should not be allowed and must be changed! Come on, bud! Kendo has been practised like this for decades and now YOU want to change it??!! Get real!

Well, he stormed out the dojo and Buster and Ray Sensei assured me there was nothing wrong with my keiko.

I spoke to my main sensei, Tony,  the next day about it, and he told me again that I had done nothing wrong and my keiko was good.

However, even with the approval of all my sensei's, the whole incident left a very bitter taste in my mouth and left me with plenty of questions - Was I too instinctive in my counter-attack by reacting like that? Was I too cocky or arrogant during our keiko or when he reprimanded me? Was I getting too personal in my keiko that he attacked me personally afterwards?

In my attempt to answer those question, I came up with the following answers:

1. Instinct is for animals. As a conscientious species, humans should control their instinct and use that in conjunction with logic and strategy in a combat situation. So, for me, I must fight back the instinctive reactions and try and blend instinct,logic and strategy into my kendo.

2. By trying to win in keiko, I am already projecting a certain amount of forcefulness that can be perceived to be arrogant or cocky. My goal in this aspect is to remain humble yet assertive at all times. Winning is not everything. I have a long way to go on this one.

3. Never get personal in a fight. It clouds judgement and makes you lose the most important thing you will need to survive: common sense. For this, I need to cultivate a rock for a heart, but a spirit that is indomitable.

I'm not sure if these are the right answers, but they are my answers nevertheless. Am I on the right path, or have I lost my direction along the way?

If it is the former, then I guess I have to say thanks to my opponent for forcibly pushing me along that path. If it is the latter, then someone please beat the crap out of me in the next keiko!